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The Thinking Lab - Who Owns a Problem? - for Members
October 22, 2019
Topic: Who Owns a Problem?
It is very common to think that if someone else would shape up and fly right, your problems would be solved. In this class, we will discuss why this is a mistaken view. Note that I have included no qualifications in that sentence.
I believe that if you have a problem with another person, it is your problem. There is work for you to do, to understand what matters most for you in that moment. Once you understand what matters to you, it's up to you to decide how to meet your own needs. That may involve changing how you're dealing with the other person, or it may not. But one way or another, you solve the problem for yourself.
This is a controversial issue that we will chew in detail. We will discuss such topics as: What do you have a right to expect from other people? What do you do when persuasion is unsuccessful? Is manipulation ever appropriate?