Topic: Rules, Boundaries, and Limitations ... Oh My!

Cesar Milan, the "Dog Whisperer," says dogs need "rules, boundaries, and limitations" from the people in their lives. But don't try to use his tactics on the people around you! You don't control them, and you shouldn't try to.

In this class, we will discuss what alternatives you have when people you care about are doing things that you disapprove of or just wish they wouldn't do. We will discuss a range of examples from the merely unpleasant (gossiping, arriving late) to the hostile (negativity and angry criticism) to the irrational (hitting, acting out).

This class takes ideas from several sources and applies a value orientation to them. As preparation, I recommend you read the blog post on My Vision for Communication. We will discuss:

• Why setting rules for other people makes any situation worse, even if they have "agreed" to them
• The alternative to ultimatums: how to set rational boundaries that you can use to take care of yourself rather than keep other people away
• What to do about your own limitations in social situations

I hope you find this timely for holiday get-togethers!

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